Monster
by Grasspaw
Summary: A series of songfics about our favorite werewolf and his Metamorphmagus. All by Skillet, all awesome. Monster.


**Second in a series. Alright... this one takes place after they've gotten married. Enjoy. I own nothing.**

_The secret side of me, I never let you see  
__I keep it caged but I can't control it  
__So stay away from me, the beast is ugly  
__I feel the rage and I just can't hold it_

Remus stood leaning against the wall outside the door to the cellar, trying to gather courage to step inside and walk down the stairs. He could just see his wife through the doorway into the next room. Dora was sitting in the kitchen at the table, reading - or at least pretending to. He knew that in actuality she was not taking in a word of the page she had now read at least five times. And who could blame her for being distracted? This was their first full moon without him taking his Wolfsbane potion. He, too, was anxious; it had been almost six months since his first real transformation. Dora had never been around when the wolf was completely in control... He'd tried so hard to hide it from her.

_It's scratching on the walls, in the closet, in the halls_  
_It comes awake and I can't control it_  
_Hiding under the bed, in my body, in my head_  
_Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?_

Finally, gathering his courage, he opened the door and walked down the stairs. He looked around with a hollow ache in his chest, staring at the damage he had caused all last year. They had moved into his house; the combined money of the Tonks and Sirius had been enough to let him stay there all through Harry's sixth year and eventually let the two move in. He brushed his fingers lightly over the claw marks on the wall, some of them nearly seven feet up. He was taller in wolf form. He felt the beast whining, clawing at his mind, and he wanted it to stop, wanted it to be over...

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_  
_I must confess that I feel like a monster_  
_I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun_  
_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

He fell to his knees, groaning, fighting it with everything he had. But already he felt despair, knowing he was losing, knowing it would hurt more if he kept fighting. And yet he didn't stop. He hated it, hated it so much... And that hate scared him. How much more he would feel when the beast had completely taken over he didn't know...

_I, I feel like a monster_  
_I, I feel like a monster_

He screamed, a long, drawn-out wail ripping itself out of his throat, and he felt himself losing control, drifting away as the beast reared its ugly head. He tried one more time, desperate, terrified. "No!" But the word became a howl, and he was gone...

_My secret side I keep hid under lock and key_  
_I keep it caged but I can't control it_  
_'Cause if I let him out he'll tear me up, break me down_  
_Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?_

The wolf raised its head, sniffing the air, its lips pulled back in a snarl. Blood... it wanted blood. _Craved _it. Desperately. But there wasn't any... And then, just like that, it smelled something. Something delicious. Something warm and red and sticky... It dived toward the corner, where Remus, its human counterpart, had carried some raw meat down earlier. Moony tore into the meat hungrily, blood dripping from its maw. Snapping jaws sent flecks of saliva and blood flying onto the walls to join the other stains. For now, it wasn't the wolf's blood...

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_  
_I must confess that I feel like a monster_  
_I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun__  
I must confess that I feel like a monster_

Moony growled angrily. There was no more meat. Anywhere. No more blood. No more delicious crunching bones. Why not? The wolf wanted more. It whined softly, then growled, then howled, an eerie, haunting, unnatural sound not of this earth. It fell silent suddenly, its ears pricked. What was that noise? A human, that's what it was. The wolf had tasted human before, completely on accident. It still remembered finding the body, already dead. But freshly dead. The human's blood had still been flowing...

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_  
_I must confess that I feel like a monster_  
_I, I feel like a monster_  
_I, I feel like a monster_

Somewhere deep within Moony, Remus was screaming at the memory. James, Sirius, and Peter, the other Marauders, had assured him the human was already dead when he found it, but he'd always wondered. But now even that small piece of Remus, the part that couldn't do anything, was completely gone, leaving nothing but the wolf... And the wolf wanted blood.

_It's hiding in the dark, it's teeth are razor sharp_  
_There's no escape for me, it wants my soul, it wants my heart_  
_No one can hear me scream, maybe it's just a dream_  
_Maybe it's inside of me, stop this monster_

It bounded into a corner, growling. It could still smell the human, somewhere. It saw a sliver of light through the crack underneath the door. Yes, that was where the scent of human was coming from. It bounded up the steps, its claws sinking into the wood. It dived at the door, throwing its full weight against it, but was thrown back as though by an invisibly hand, rolling down the stairs even as it shrieked. In anger, it tore at its own skin, lapping up the blood, delighting in the taste. So delicious... so delicious... It went back in for more.

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_  
_I must confess that I feel like a monster_  
_I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun_  
_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

Moony was feeling lightheaded, staring at the walls that seemed to be spinning around it. The wolf was standing in puddles of its own blood, and even it had to admit that, much as it wanted more blood, it could get no more from its own body. Angered by this fact, it threw itself at the walls, sinking its teeth and claws into the wood, ripping, tearing, pulling, breaking...

_I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin_  
_I must confess that I feel like a monster_  
_I've gotta lose control, here's something radical_  
_I must confess that I feel like a monster_

Hours later, long after the wolf had returned to tearing and ripping its own flesh, long after the blood had dried on the wall, long after the crying human woman on the other side of the door had run upstairs to her bedroom, a wolf howled, the growled, then whimpered. Slowly, that whimper became a moan, that moan became a groan, and that groan became a scream as Moony became Remus, a broken-hearted wizard who needed to see to his injuries. The ones that would heal, at least...

_I, I feel like a monster_  
_I, I feel like a monster_  
_I, I feel like a monster_  
_I, I feel like a monster_

And he hated it.


End file.
